Knocking On The Door

I stood at the brink
The abyss staring back at me
Whispers seeping through the cracks
Half promises, half threats

Behind me, machines hummed and banged,
People laughed
But the air around me began to hum too-
Stronger, electric

I felt the pull
An overwhelming urge
A voice that isn't a voice
Telling me I'm chosen
Telling me I'm close
Telling me I'll have it all

I blink, and I see it all
With each breath, I move closer
To the door of the universe
I touch it, feel its heat
Its danger, its call

But not yet
Not today
I still know my name

Nightmare

I awake into a nightmare
Pulled down by demons
Darkness everywhere I turn-
I feel their eyes burning into me,
Judging, Mocking

Ridicule echoes around me
They circle closer
Feeding on my fear

As the darkness closes in
And I start to surrender to the demons-
Something whispers in  my ear:
You're worth it, and I'm here with you

Suddenly, the laughter stops
I feel the fear within my demons
The darkness begins to lift

I fall asleep into a dream
And I know now
I must have an angel
Watching over me

Lifeline

Adrift in a sea of insanity,
The darkness closing in
You shine like a lighthouse-
So bright, lifting the shadows
You are my lifeline

Lost I was, but now I'm found
As you guide me to shore
Even as the sharks swirl
Relentless and hungry
You don't waver or quiver-
You stay strong

Through crashing waves and strom
You cradled me with steady hands
Until I could swim on my own
I was drowning-
In fear, in silence

Yet you stayed
You never turned away
From the wreck I was
You are my lifeline

Now each day is a gift
Each sunrise, a whisper of hope
And when the storm comes again
As it will
I'll look to you
The light that never dimmed 

You are my lifeline

The Shadow

Always attached to me
A presence I can never escape-
You are my shadow.

They call you harmless
But they don't see what you hold:
The pain of presence
The rage of living
The suffering I don't know how to carry.

I feed you
Not because I want to-
But because I can't hold it all inside me
And everytime I do
You grow stronger

I just needed to smile
To keep moving forward
To be alright
But you always followed
Walking beside me
Laughing where I cannot
Taunting what I try to hide

I feared you
Because you always saw everything I couldn't face-
And I knew you would never forget it

So I kept feeding you
Kept you queit
Kept you close enough to control
But you were never still
Always growing
Patiently waiting
Relentlessly hungry to become something I couldn't contain

In the light you shift-
Dancing around me, changing shape
Mocking the version of me I show the world
But in the dark, you change
You grow heavier
Louder
You consume the night

And then something breaks
The weight is lifted
The bond is gone
Or maybe it was never there
You are free

I feel you everywhere now-
Not beside me
Not following me
But inside everything I am
Your eyes burn through me
I hear you laughing when I sleep
Waiting
Always waiting

I try to believe what other say-
That you are just my shadow
But I know better

You are me